Sleepless and wide-eyed, my roommate and I sat in the slumber of the night reveling in the favorable thrills of post-exam fever. Nights of revision, pseudo-siestas and coffee interruptions crafted the unadulterated medical mosaic that culminated itself into our final end of year paper (‘o the joys of a disturbed sleep-wake cycle). Our endeavors of getting some rest were thoroughly vanquished as we recollected past memories and present affairs. It was clear that we both relished the freedom that liberally beamed in the palm of our hands. Amid the conversation and semi-deep moments, he uttered something that got me thinking. He got me thinking about tomorrow. It was not a twenty-four-hour trajectory of tomorrows destiny nor was it a trivial matter in its magnitude (well, at-least to me). It was simply that. Tomorrow. Future events and future chapters that have yet to be read and lived. I wish, with all sincerity, that I could say that I have it all figured out. I wish to figure out, with impeccable discernment, what I need to figure out. I wish to know the nitty grits about the happenings that lay ahead of me. I wish to know the how’s, when’s and why’s as I slowly interject moments of head-scratching with the occasional “what?”
“Will you go out without knowing?”
The future appears to latch strongly onto chunks of our forthcoming human experience: future job; future house; future “bae”; future career; future ministry- the list is endless. Impending expectations about “tomorrow” short circuit our minds shocking our system with questions that, on the face, have no immediate answer at times. One would think that our microwave “insta-generation” would have greater certainty and assurance with the wide-array of options and choices that lay scattered waiting to be picked and experienced (the world is your oyster they say). Yet, our confidence about tomorrow, at times, dwindles mercilessly as the fog and mist of tomorrows chapters cloud our vision of the frontier ahead. The questions and misgivings that we have (“will I be able to secure a good job in this economy?…will the dreams and ideas that I have ever be realized?…will my marriage hold ground?”) are sincere for the most part. Our ability to see the fine print of the future details may be blurred. That’s okay. The plan has never really been for us to set our vision and cast our gaze on the details of the script. As the directors of Hollywood write plays to be watched, the Director of creation tells His cast and His audience to watch Him instead. Gods heart for you and me is that our gaze be on Him. As Oswald Chambers put it “Have you been asking God what He is going to do? At times, God does not tell you what He is going to do; He reveals to you who He is.” The journey that God has or is calling you to is one of deep intimacy with Him. It is a life of knowing His heart as we share ours with Him. As we come into deeper relationship with God we receive a greater awareness of where we are at not because we know where we are exactly heading but because we know Him- and because He knows us. What questions do you have about tomorrow? What aspect about tomorrow does God not already know? What aspects about tomorrow can God not handle? “Will you go out without knowing?…Suppose God is the God you know Him to be when you are nearest to Him- what an impertinence worry is! Let the attitude of life be a continual ‘going out’ in dependence upon God, and your life will have an ineffable charm about it which is a satisfaction to Jesus. You have to learn to go out of convictions, out of creeds, out of experiences, until so far as your faith is concerned, there is nothing between yourself and God. ”
Because He lives we can face tomorrow. Because He lives all fear is gone. Because we know that He holds the future, life is worth the living because He lives .
At His Feet…
1. My Utmost for His Highest, Oswald Chambers
2. Song lyrics: Because He lives (Bill Gaither)