They say silence is golden. They say the words unspoken speak the loudest. As I picked myself from sleeps tender seduction, I found myself shelving the one thing I knew I ought to do. ‘I’m back’ seemed to be a cheap entrée to a badly cooked Christmas dinner. It was like trying to explain why the chicken tastes like it died. A ‘spiritual sabbatical’ would be far too pretentious of an excuse (though that would be impressive). ‘Writers block’ would pave way for head nodding and hearty agreement for those who understand the trade (safe scapegoat yes?). Yet, in the crux of my being, I knew. In the core of me I knew all too well. The depths of me echoed the shallowness that lingered in my souls treasury box beckoning whether the sparkling diamonds are mere fragmented pieces of broken glass covered in fading glitter. God did not feel distant. In fact, He never quite did. He stood there (where He said He would be). And I stood there (where He said I should be). Choosing to stand on my feet, I steadily stood up from His, wondering why I felt far, dejected and disinterested. Writing of the deep pursuit felt nothing more than an empty rhetoric squealing pitchy crescendos, attempting to deafen the music that was glaring in my face. So I did the logically illogical. Nothing.
I’m in a place of [insert vague metaphor]
We often times (more often than not) find ourselves in this space. We often find ourselves gravitating towards this vacuum that calls us for momentary ‘safe keeping.’ Overtime we purchase a bed, a few Netflix episodes and unwholesome edibles to keep us awake through the torrential night. Soon this space becomes home. Talking to a few of Gods kids, the blatancy of our shared season pondered questions that beckoned more questions. The normalcy of ‘getting by’ tethered a unified ‘perhaps this is it’ mantra. Days turned into weeks as weeks turned into months. I soon feared that this may perhaps be life. Each moment summoned a new explanation of the same thing- take your pick: valley; desert; storm (and my personal favourite: ‘I’m in a place of [insert vague metaphor]). I randomly ambled through the room dispelling the usual days musings. It was in then that I bumped into Him again- unintentionally. I felt heavens truth stream in violently gently watering the desert of my soul: ‘It is all good.’
It is all good…
As the year dawns on us again, we long for many things; better relationships; better diets; more peace of mind. Yet, the singular thing that we all unanimously look for is hope; hope for a better tomorrow; hope for a better family; hope for a better life. Our journey with God is no different. The drudgery and muck that latches onto our spiritual roots, pins us flat on our face wondering when and if things will get better; wondering when and if the storm will end; wondering when and if we will see His face. Yet God Himself each day continues to breathe hope into our souls. “The way of the righteous is like the first gleam of dawn, which shines ever brighter until the full light of day .” Though the clouds rain heavy above our heads, forecasting a shadow of despair, the sun still remains, shining ever so brightly . “We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed .” “We have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us .” We are never without hope. Each struggle, each hardship and each trial is a daily reminder that we have One who lives in us; that we have One who gives us strength beyond the seen realm; that we have One who shines behind and beyond the thicket of our clouds: Jesus.
We step into the New Year with all our frailties and all our strength knowing that it is all good because He says so. We step into the New Year because He has already written the script. We step into the New Year because He says ‘Go to the other side.’ We step into the New Year knowing we have a sure hope.
Remember God. Remember hope.
18 I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in his holy people, 19 and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is the same as the mighty strength 20 he exerted when he raised Christ from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, 21 far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every namethat is invoked, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. 22 And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, 23 which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way. (Ephesians 1:18-23)
At His Feet…
- Proverbs 4:18 (New Living Translation)
- Unconditional Love (Movie)
- 2 Corinthians 4:8-9 (New International Version)
- 2 Corinthians 4:7 (New International Version)